I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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