Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
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