She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
I am full of burrito and curiosity
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize
