please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Randomize