They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
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