I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
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