Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
