Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
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