i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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