Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Randomize