oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
