she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Randomize