I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Randomize
