Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Randomize
