My boss' voice literally gives me gas
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
Operation Purity has been aborted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Randomize