So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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