I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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