Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
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