his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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