theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
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