Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
