just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
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