We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
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He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
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I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
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