Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
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