You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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