I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize