Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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