Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
