Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize