WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
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So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
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