i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
