I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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