me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
