Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
