The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
