I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
