Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Randomize
