my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
