hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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