i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
