Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Your penis caused this!
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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