Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize