the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Randomize
