my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
