I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
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