I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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