You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
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just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
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You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.