I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.