Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
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all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
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