I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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