You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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